Starting over on Monday…

So, what do you do when you decide to make a major change in your life?  I quit my soul-sucking job last week.  It will be a bit tough for awhile, but I have to remind myself it’s for the best right now and isn’t permanent.  I quit for a lot of reasons, but in the end I flat hated my soul sucking experience and even though they’ve called all weekend long to make sure that I am 100% positive on this decision — I already know that I am.  I never called them back.  I guess I just don’t have anything to say after all that time spent there.

What will I do this Monday?  Well, I applied for SSDI so I can move to an independent living center closer to great friends and doctors that aren’t quacks.   Assuming it’s not raining cats and dogs Mondays I’ll be walking.  Well, even if it does I’ll try to do more walking… reading… thinking… being.   Taking care of myself for awhile.  My nephew, Levi, was great about it.  He was like, if you go back on Monday will you be any happier there?  The short answer is “no.”

So, here is to a whole new Monday.



Away i go…

Let me just say it is a million times easier to journal than to blog — mainly because I kept so much of it (and myself) locked tight.  I’m trying to make some changes for the positive.  I always hate when people say that they are changing for the positive or for the better — like their best wasn’t good enough.  Well, what if it’s not?  My present path landed me in the hospital in another state and I was content not to tell anyone I was sick until the pain was unbearable.
I always want to be strong.  The kind of person someone can look up to.  I struggle with depression daily.  So, I fight with thoughts of being lower than gum on the bottom of one’s shoe all of the time.  It’s a work in progress.  I’m making myself eat healthy and stay hydrated.  I’m cutting my work load in the coming weeks by half and next weekend it’s back on the crutches on  the walker.
Oh, and the journal title?  Yes, I know that in English or in Spanish that “I’m not a Unicorn.”  I would hope that I remember that there isn’t a magical threshold for declaring me a Unicorn (or anything else negative fill in the blank) &  I may refer to being or not being a Unicorn to prove to myself I really was listening to what my friends had to say when I really needed most to hear I mattered… Unicorn or not, but thankfully I’m not one.